write something to myself
when i am in the swimming pool, i recall the memories i ever drowned in the swimming pool in that time when i was little boy i think probably seven years old. since i have the experience drowning, i almost couldn't go swimming because i fear i maybe drown again whatever in any swimming pool. i hate swimming just because that accident probably happens again. that thing still remain in my heart. and today when i swim, i also recall another thing. i don't know i recall my cousin, who is my aunt's son, he usually bullied me whatever i got into their home or he got into my home. i hate the feeling when i was bullied that is very sad things to me because i don't know how to tell him '' fucking you don't bully me because i will beat you back '' so i still was bullied by that cousin. and i remembered another cousin also bullied me. oh this is so fucking thing to me. it's so hard to say anything about my sadness in my heart you know, i even don't kn